In the spirit of becoming more positive toward my health and happiness, I will be moving and changing the name of this journal. Instead of dwelling on "DEtoxifying", I will concentrate more on "PROhealthy". And with that in mind, I will worry less about what I need to remove from or avoid in my life, and instead spend my energy on concentrating what is good and right and healthy for my life.

And so this journal will be changing its name (and moving) to spillshertea. It's not the cleverest of names, but it is the most succinct and precise name I could come up with to maintain where and who I want to be. "Abundance" refers to so many positive aspects of life, and "Health" is self-explanatory: Healthy of body, mind and spirit. Within "abundance" is also my idea of what is involved in my true happines. And within that happiness is my being an artist. It defines who I feel I truly am at my core. I'm "putting it out there".

I am an artist:
A happy, healthy and successful artist.

Initially, I was simply going to change the name of this journal, but realized I didn't need to spend $15 to do so. If I'm going to start fresh, then I should just start FRESH. And so... I will add my current friends to my new journal. Please add me in return if you like. I will be doing much of the same in this new journal. It will deal with food and health and mental, physical and spacial progress in heart and home. And hopefully I will be exploring even more within these new pages.

I hope to see you there.
Peace and abundance.
spillshertea

I didn't go to work yesterday, so I was logging my food and such via my LJ client on my home computer. And proceeded to forget to post it. Oops.
When I get home later I'll post it and try to back date it to yesterday.

*sigh*
It figures.
I was naughty, and broke my detox last night.
But in my defense, I had a minor breakdown, and really needed the soothing taste of red red wine.
And... um... a couple pieces of pizza.
*flggrtrhtlhtfft*

What's a girl to do? I'd been pretty good for a solid week.

Here's my tally (not including last night):
5 1/2 months since my last cigarette (and probably won't ever touch one again)
9 days without cheese or dairy
8 days without wheat or gluten (or almost completely none)
8 days without an alcoholic beverage
6 days without any more than 1/2 cup of regular (or 1/2 decaf) coffee.

Not awful.
But not fabulous either.
I need another week or two of diligence before I will feel comfortable in new eating habits.
There are two days next week where I might feel the need to imbibe.
One is Sam's birthday night. (Although, I think I'll be ok that day, since it's a work night)
The other is this Saturday night, we're having dinner with some family... and it's likely to be a little stressful.
I'm pretty sure I'll need a glass of wine to get through it. We'll see.

End of DAY 8 : Tuesday, April 10th, evening.
Got to BMG in good time.
Picked up some coffee for Sam (and decaf for me) at Intelligentsia.
Then tried out this new joint nearby called "Veg Out". It's basically a glorified salad tosser joint.
And I intend no euphamism.
You pick a big (as in massive) bowl of greens: spring mix, spinach, or romaine (I chose spinach) and hand it to the person behind the counter. They have what is, basically, a salad bar and a pair of tongs. You tell them what to throw in the bowl. You pick a dressing. They toss it. And then they charge you a little over $9. (You get a small bread roll or breadsticks, as well.) The only advantage to this service seems to be the limited amount of people screwing around and sneezing in the salad bar. But it's an incredibly over priced venture, however convenient. I had them put in a hard boiled egg (which they sliced for me, in one of those little egg slicer thingies), black beans, corn, carrots, cucumber, zucchini, and some balsalmic viniagrette (which was WAAAAAAAY too sweet. Bleh). I also picked up a can of orange San Pellegrino soda, only to find out that it has sugar in it (I assumed it was more like lemon Perrier... just flavor, no sugar), and was also way to sweet. I gave that and my bread roll to my friend, Sarah, at work.

All in all, I can't say that I would go back. But then... if I want a made to order salad, with a decent choice of toppings... this would do in a pinch.

5:00pm
By the time I got to Blue Man for work, I was ravenous and ate my salad.
Then I had some Mary's Gone Crackers.
I had a cup of decaf coffee (free with my purchase at Intelligentsia... what's a girl to do?) = BAD!
I also had some of my cranberry trail mix (I really love this stuff).
A fruit cup (mostly melon).
And a large cup of the BIJA "deep cleanse" tea (double bagged).

Stopped at Whole Foods on the way home to pick up more juice and veggies and gluten-free crackers.
Wasn't nearly as cranky as I was earlier in the day, but the fuzzy funk was still there.

Was in bed by 11:00pm.

---

DETOX : DAY 9 : Wednesday, April 11th, 2007
Took a "mental health day" today, and called in. And boy howdy, am I glad.
The weather was/is deplorable. It's STILL snowing. And I think my stars that I do not have to go out in it.
This fact alone makes me very happy.

I got up at 6:30am = GOOD!
But all I did was check my email, blend up leftover smoothie (from yesterday, only I added some orange slices) and start Sam's coffee.
It still felt good to get up a bit earlier.
I sipped on the smoothie throughout the morning.

8:30am
After my shower...
I ended up drinking one small cup of coffee.
I couldn't resist. It was there, leftover after Sam had left. It smelled so fine. So good.
It was ORGANIC! (Sumatra).
I also snacked on one of those stick in the throat gluten-free blueberry bars.

10:30am
STARVING.
After spending most of the morning on computer related business, updating some photo stuff, and a little messing around online, I finally realized I needed more food before I could get to anything of major import around the house. The main reason I wanted to take today, was to do some household maintenance and deal with some scattered paperwork. Get it cleaned up and orgainized.
I made some more falafel (leftover mix from Saturday) and had an exact repeat of Saturday's lunch.

11:00am
4 Psyllium husk tabs
1 Gingerforce (organic)
2 Native Woman (organic)
1 FishSMART Ultra (fish oil w/peppermint)(from "Renew Life")
1 Source of Life Ultra Multivitamin
2 Evening Primrose oil (organic)
Lots of water.

Detox : Day 5

Hummus
Falafel (cooked in organic olive oil)
Organic spring mix greens
Organic lemon wedges
Organic green pepper
Organic cucumber
Vine tomato

...and some paprika

Saturday, April 7, 2007

Slept in again (I REALLY love this about the weekends. I enjoy sleep.).
Would have loved to get up earlier today, but it was TOO DAMN COLD! Winter weather makes me hole back up under the covers.
No sunshine today, either. That didn't help.

Got out of bed around 10:00am.
I made a really awesome smoothie using fruits from last summer still in my freezer that I got at the farmer's markets.
Strawberries, blueberries, and peaches.
Added veggie water (the leftover water from steaming my carrots & broccoli last night), organic cranberry juice, and blueberry pomegranate juice.
Used my old blender for the VERY last time (damn thing leaked all over AND you can clearly smell that the motor is going out). But I didn't want to take the time to wash the new blender. I'm SO glad I have a new blender. (YAY! For my new blender! I can't wait to bust it out tomorrow)

Sam kept sticking his coffee mug under my nose, so I ended up taking 3 nice swigs of his coffee (spread out over the morning).

I don't think it had any effect on me, but I had NO headache all day. HURRAH! I think my episode on Thursday was my only "withdraw" episode. That's a REALLY good sign.

12:00noon
Made a very nice vegan lunch (photos to come).
Falafel & hummus (from Fantastic Foods mixes) (I added a little paprika & tumeric to the hummus)
with organic cucumber, vine tomato, organic green pepper, organic spring greens & lemon.
(The falafel mix is not "wheat free", but the only wheat ingredients were pretty far down the list. So I let it slide.)
Perrier w/ blueberry pomegranate juice

4:00pm
Detoxer tea (double bagged)
4 bites organic swiss chocolate w/almonds (Whole Foods 365 organic brand)

5:00pm
2 pieces Spelt Ancient Grain bread (Rudi's Organic Bakery)* toasted
w/ organic Earth Balance vegan spread & organic strawberry preserves (Trader Joe's)
And a big glass of filtered water.

*I found out too late (as in after I purchased it) that "spelt" is actually "wheat". There was no indication of this on the wrapper, but the website clearly states that those with wheat and gluten allergies should be aware. I don't like wasting food, however. And since it's all organic, and in all other ways "good" for me, I decided to go ahead and use it anyway. It's a modest size loaf, so... LET ME EAT BREAD! *dammit*

I'm feeling a bit tired, anxious, and Snack-y-McSnacks-a-lot. I'm craving anything that I don't have or can't eat. That's usually when I turn to herbal tea or lemon fizzy water. I'll live, but it sucks to feel uncomfortable like this. I'm also a little ADHD right now. I have a load of laundry in the dryer downstairs and we're leaving in about an hour to go out to see a play, so I'm in that weird LIMBO zone (without the catchy tune to go with, and lacking the flexibility to make it under the pole). It must be time to play cute games on the internet.
Yes.
I think it is.

6:00pm
Laundry done. (Just one load, however... *sigh*)
Bedsheets changed.
Time to load the photo of my lunch and get ready to go out.

Ummmm... OK.
So...

So, I'm a complete wimp.
Maybe not a complete wimp, but a partially almost maybe a bit of a big ol' detox pansy.
It's that or I have more severe blood sugar issues than I realize.
The "Juice Fast"... was so fast, it's over already.

Here's the scoop:
Sam and I both had today off, so we lingered in bed until about 9:30am. He's still coughing up a storm, and I just enjoy lying in bed for a spell in the morning, talking about our dreams and stuff. It was nice. I got up (finally) and made myself some lemon water (one small organic lemon w/filtered water). Our kitchen was a bit of a mess, so I didn't really have the counter space to bust out the new blender I bought, and start making the smoothies. Plus, I wasn't able to wash it, because the sink was full of dirties (we have no dishwasher... besides Sam, that is.), and I was way too lazy to do anything constructive. So I showered, used my nice detox scrub (yummy),
and tried to start my day with an orange (organic).
I even cut it up into nice pretty wedges.
And I had 3 of them. Just three. It was kind of tart for an orange, and it just wasn't doing it for me.

I was intensely crabby and depressed and miserable and anxious before it was even 11:00am.
And I was STARVING. (No headache, however. Which was a nice sign.)
And my morning constitutional was not happening either (trying to keep it easy on the details for now).
(I had two swigs of Sam's fully leaded coffee, to no avail.)

Juice, water, and fruit were NOT going to cut it.
11:30am
I caved and made a bowl of leftover black beans & brown rice.
And I was HAPPY. So very HAPPY.
Apparently, fasting does not agree with me.
And I'm a lucky girl who is fortunate to have food on my plate anytime I need/want it.
I am grateful for that blessing.

I need my carbs, folks. Or some type of "solid" food. That's all there is too it.
I later had one more small swig of Sam's coffee.
But those three swallows (total) were the extent of my caffeine intake for the day. And I survived. (It's 5:30pm as I write this).

Sam and I took a walk in the FREEZING weather, to go to the bank and get some quarters for the laundry. Seriously... 32 degrees!?!?!?! It's not easy to detox and relax when it's so frickin' cold. And of course we have no control over our heat. And OF COURSE, we recently opened almost ALL the storm windows because it was in the 70's last week!!! Meh. Seriously, though... it's not recommended to try and detox in extreme weather. This is why it is almost always recommended for spring and fall. I honestly believe that I wouldn't have had such trouble this morning, if it wasn't so damned cold in our apartment. We also got the registration renewal sticker for Bernice (That's my car, for those not in the know). I came home and did some dishes, the steamed some broccoli and carrots and had those and a 1/2 cup of brown rice for lunch (2:00pm). And 2 Psyllium husk tabs (still working on that "constitutional" *ahem*).

I'm still putting off the laundry. Mainly, because it's SO FRICKIN' COLD, and I have to go OUTSIDE to do it!
I cannot impart just how BADLY I want to live somewhere with my own washer and dryer.
Regardless, it felt good to do some constructive work around the house. I have more on my plate for later, that also doesn't necessarily involve the basement laundry room (or the mat).
Hmph.

4:00pm
Had a cup of Detoxer tea (double bagged) and 4 pieces of organic fluer de sel caramel milk chocolate bites (from a Whole Food's bar).
I don't know what my deal is with chocolate right now. I don't eat a lot at any one sitting, no more than 4 bites, but I CRAVE CRAVE CRAVE it. I know it also has a bit of caffeine. And normally I restrict myself to dark chocolate. This chocolate was a definite NO-NO, since it's "milk". And the caramel was sugar... so. I blew that, too. But I finished off the bar with those last few bites, so I feel good about not wasting quality chocolate. And I'm not going to beat myself up over it. Not yet.

4:45pm
Did some upper body work with my 10lb hand weights & stretches (upper body/arms only) while watching some Edutainment on the Tivo.

5:30pm
Glass of San Pellegrino w/ 1/2 squeezed organic lemon.

(from memory, the next day)
I know I had some organic blue chips w/ organic tomato black bean salsa
And some ogranic veggie hommos w/organic "Mary's Gone Crackers" original (wheat & gluten-free) (I REALLY like these! They're nutty and super crunchy and good!)
I watched a movie, sorted through junk mail, did more dishes, and took a long hot bath in some detox mineral salts/essential oils, while sipping on some "deep cleanse" herb tea, and lots of water. I accomplished a few things, but didn't get around to even HALF of what I intended. I kept it pretty lazy. Oh well. And hey... managed to go through the day with NO headache!

Fell asleep watching the Cubs game w/Sam after he got home from rehearsal, and went to be around midnight.

DAY 3

Woke up around 5:00am, but didn't want to get up just yet.
My right eye was burning (from the Vick's VapoRub in the room, I think)
so I tossed and turned until 7:00am.

Made French-pressed DECAF coffee (Intelligentsia SWP Black Cat Blend)
with just dash of Organic Sumatra.
Had one cup before leaving.
Had an Emergen-C, too.

Drove to work, arrive 9:00am.
Sippin' on coffee (pretty cold at this point).

10:00am
Small glass grapefruit juice.

10:30am
Large handful of cranberry trail mix

12:00noon
2 Beano
(Leftovers = microwaved)
2 organic polenta slices
1/2 cup organic black beans (w/onion & g.pepper)
1/2 cup organic brown rice (cooked w/organic veggie broth)
1/4 vine tomato
Spring water

Feeling a little off today. Feverish, light-headed, mild headache. I'm pretty sure it's the lack of caffeine.
I refuse to catch Sam's cold.

3 Wellness Formula tabs
1 Fish oil w/peppermint oil (organic)
2 "Source of Life" multivitamins
1 "Align" (probiotic - Bifantis)
2 Evening Primrose oil (organic)
2 Psyllium husks (veg)

1:50pm
2 bites of organic dark (swiss) chocolate.

I have A MAJOR HEADACHE right now, and I still have to go to Blue Man to work tonight. The chocolate should help a bit.
And no, chocolate is not exactly "allowed" on my detox diet, however I'm still tapering off, and it does have its medicinal effects.

2:05pm
One cup "English Teatime" (black) tea. (Apparently, the decaf coffee wasn't enough to stave off the migraine.

2:20pm
Yep. That helped take the edge off (yes... it happens that fast), although it did not completely rid me of the aching pain.
Sad, the state of my caffeine addiction!

4:00pm
A few bites of a mangled organic pear.
And I'm off to job #2.

---

Yummy.

DAYS 1, 2 & 3 are for tapering off and warming up for my juice fast beginning on Friday, and the continuing month.

Woke up at 7:00am.
Juice of one (small) organic lemon w/glass of filtered water.
Small glass (Florida Naturals) ruby red grapefruit juice.
2 Daily Dophilus A.M.
One cup coffee* (2/3 DECAF Intelligentsia Black Cat SWP & 1/3 Organic Sumatra)

* I'm not cutting the coffee/caffeine completely until Friday, when I have three full days to relax. Caffeine withdrawal gives me crazy migraines. And even though I've cut down immensely with a lot more decaf, I'm sure it will still have a rather crappy effect on my body. Which I can't deal with at work.

Drove to work (in the rain). Arrived at 9:10am.
Sipped on another cup or so of coffee throughout the morning.

9:45am
Gluten free blueberry bar (Glutino). (Unfortunately, not the tastiest.)
Finished off my coffee.
Lots of spring water (Ice Mountain).

11:30am
1 Prevacid** (30 mg)
Spring water
1 can Muir Glen organic Southwest Black Bean soup (microwaved).
I kinda forgot to cook last night. (oops) This was all I had of substance to take with me to work today.

**I'm not ready to stop taking this just yet. It works too well. I'm going to stop on Friday, however, for at least a week, to see how I do. GERD is not worth it, detox or no. We'll see.

1:30pm
One (med) organic D'anjou pear

3:00pm
1/2 organic lemon (small) sqeezed
1 pint Perrier

3:40pm
Feeling a little headache-y.
Kinda hungry.
Will be noshing on some cranberry trail mix (all unsalted, cranberries are sweetened & enhanced w/ Omega 3s - from Trader Joes) on my way to Blue Man tonight.

I'm making a cup of BIJA "deep cleanse" tea for the road, as well.

And the rest I'll post later tonight or tomorrow afternoon.

*peace*

And so it begins again...
I will begin a COMPLETE DETOX next Tuesday, April 3rd for at least a full month or more.

I will be documenting this month THOROUGHLY.
This will be almost completely vegan, with an attempt at gluten-free.
I will taper off during the week and try a juice fast for the weekend of April 6-8.
I will take a full week off from exercise that following week.

And of course...
NO caffeine. (Although, the occasional green tea might be called for)
NO alcohol.
NO meat. (Except non-toxic fish, at least once a week.)
NO preservatives.
NO processed foods or sugars.

My goal is overall BALANCE.

PEACE.